.where.time.stands.still.

oh.god. where to even begin. I think instead of trying to pull strings in my brain trying to remember all the things I've wanted to blog about, I think I'll just start with my most recent adventure. 

I feel like my eyes have been opened to a whole new world. A world where material things aren't that important. A world where you can loose yourself on a beach for hours. A world where the people are friendly and the sun always shines. I spent 5 nights in Albuferia, Portugal and it was absolutely breathtaking. Not only do I want to visit again, but I'd like my own little flat by the beach. If you've ever been to a very touristy beach destination, you'll notice that along the beautiful coast will be a wall of hotels. There was a beach about a 10 minute walk from our hotel and it was delightful. A few beach front restaurants, but the entire area was just local housing. Such a very different way of living out there. Vacation really does take all your stress away, especially when you have no way of being contacted to the outside world. But this trip has made me realize that its not the vacation that relaxes you, its the place.Your environment is what gives you a lot of your stress and as much as you would like to "zen" out your home, its not enough to really feel relaxed. Imagine waking up to the sun warming your face. You go to work at whatever job you have. Walk home, which over looks the ocean, and maybe take a walk to the beach to end your day. Take off those socks and shoes and feel the sand squish in between your toes exfoliating all those rough edges. Take a deep breath of that crisp clean air. Have a seat and just watch. Watch the kids play volleyball nearby, watch the waves crash into the pier, watch the birds soar in the sky and the sun slowly making its way down. Imagine doing that everyday. That is the life I want. To be at total peace. 

Coming home from our wonderful vacation was like a slap in the face. Flying over England above the clouds the sun was shinning and so soothing, but after really looking at these clouds, not a single break in cloud. Not a single hole where sun could possibly shine through. I knew before we even landed that it would be a depressing day in the UK, or should I say a regular day in the UK. Everyone needs vacation, its a holidays for your soul, for your insanity. We made friends with our bartenders - Felipe and Weyde - they moved from Brasil to Portugal for a somewhat better life, the economy is more stable in Portugal and more jobs. They had the right idea, one hot country to the next. Why I decided to move to England is beyond me lol. I think its time for another change :) 
But I have to say, everywhere I have been gives me a little insight as to what I want in the end, where I want to be. This is supposed to be a time to discover, to find out more about myself and I am glad to actually see it. Like for instance, I WANT EUROPEAN COFFEE for the rest of my life. The coffee in Portugal was absolutely mouthwatering deliciousness! After moving to the UK, tea has pretty much replaced my daily coffee. It was SO good to be a regular coffee drinker, but even better because it was European coffee, best EVER. I am totally going to be one of those crazy people who spends like $1200 on an imported espresso maker.... you think im crazy now, but once you come over and your lips touch that coffee, you will be a believer too. trust. 

We also had the chance to meet a very lovely couple at our resort. Its nice to be at an age where you can actually engage in conversation with people that are older and enjoy what they have to say. Its a real grown-up feeling lol. The conversations feel so different when you engage with an older generation and its funny how you can have so much in common when at such different stages. The way I see it, you start off as babies with no worries. Then you grow up and work like a crazy mule to save a nest egg of cash. Then you get old and tired and go back to the time of no worries. The couple we met is now in the stages of total relaxation while we have just begun the grunt work of life. Is it my retirement yet?!

The sunshine does a lot for your mood, soul, and overall health. If you don't believe me, move to the UK and then go on vacation! 

More pictures on our gallery (link on the right!)

.left.behind.

I miss the focus that we put on our relationship back at home. The only care we had back home was making each other happy. All we cared about what keeping ourselves entertained, and enjoying the company of our family and friends. There was no worrying about getting paid correctly and on time because CANADIANS do that shit right. There was no hassle getting food, no need to WALK to a grocery store and then hull it home, we had our own cars. We could pick up groceries in the middle of the night thanks to 24hour Sobeys... that idea is now just a distant memory because here nothing is 24 hours. My chiro, massage, and doctor were all obtainable whenever I wanted...and now I've got none. No morning stress of trying to figure out where to go because i had a car and a gps - traded that in for shitty public transit. all our friends were a hop or skip away. Life was good. We were focused on a good life. we traded all that for distance. Distance was big for us, always driving, always in a car, always the crappy goodbyes. now we never have to deal with that. we are always together minus the times im at work. We traded all that for the possibility of travel - to see Europe. What I left behind was a shitty waitress job - although, as shitty as it was, it was a job I could take time away from, leave at the end of the day and not take home, it was somewhat fitting. But part of moving out here was to take a step forward. A step in my career and a step forward in our relationship, which is what is happening. As much as I hate hate hate my job sometimes, its giving me the experience that Canada couldn't. As for the moving forward in our relationship, that we definitely are. Worrying about something to do is the least of our worries now. Back at home things were simple, we just have more on our plate. And regardless of where we are in the world, all the new things we have to deal with, would have happened. Moving forward isn't always the easiest, but something we all have to do.  Moving forward with the right person is where some people will make a mistake. I am ever so happy to know I am with the right person. I found this quote online somewhere, and it made me stop and think - yeah, that IS my babe. How luck am I :)

“Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you.... The one who turns to his friends and says, 'that's her.'”

.breaking.point.

 

That comic has pretty much been my life for the past few weeks. And im referring to the wild animals in the background. The picture to the left is what I do all day. So much to the point where I am loosing my voice. I think I've just about had it. If you were unaware, I've been working with a particular year one class that has been raised by animals. 5-6 year old children who have a complete disregard for any type of human behaviour; who cannot mimic human behaviour or kindness. I would put my money on it, they are the hardest and most challenging group of children in all of Birmingham. Children who cannot for the LIFE of them sit on a carpet quietly. Cannot line up quietly, cannot go to a table and work quietly, who don't know how to raise their hand to speak. Children who can't ask to go to the toilet and just run out whenever they want. Children who punch other kids, kick other kids in the back. The violence is unsettling. The language - oh my g**. These Children cannot read or write because no teaching can be done due to the fact that every adult in the room is trying to tame them. There are a few good ones, the type you wish you could just multiply because they are so excellent. This class is never ill. ALL 30 of them show up everyday. EVERY.DAY. Its a break for the parents really. There is a group of them that should be put into special behavioural schools because they do not understand how to interact within a classroom. A teacher who never raises her voice absolutely lost it today and just about broke the windows on the door for slamming it so hard.... that is how wonderful my day was. We have tried just about everything. But still they can't seem to get anything right. The problem is.... these children need a dam good beating. When I was younger, talking back to ANY adult would get you a smack. Getting daily bad reports from your teachers would most definitely get you a good beating. Today kids are dam spoiled. They come home to their Wii's, PlayStations, computers, whatever. I have had to speak to parents every single day. My efforts are all used up. I feel like I have aged 10 years in the 2 weeks I've spent with this lot. The pay just about isn't worth it. If you have any suggestions, please, lets hear them lol because I am just about out of ideas. And physical violence doesn't count.... I wish it did!

.the.end.of.an.era.

How can one of the largest fast food chains all of a sudden stop the customization of burgers? HOW? In case you were unaware, Mc Dees refuses to make any changes to your burgers, " New Company Policy" is what they say. Now I like my burgers pretty plain, just cheese and lettuce. The double cheeseburgers that they make don't come with lettuce, and apparently they can't PUT fucking lettuce on a burger anymore. The manager we spoke to had no real explanation as to WHY they couldn't, but said we could BUY a fucking SALAD so I could put lettuce on my dam burger. BURGERS ARE MEANT TO HAVE LETTUCE ON THEM! They used to charge for the extra lettuce, and fine, ill pay the ridiculous fee to have lettuce on my burger, and now I can't even do that. Fuck you buy a salad. I also don't understand, if Mc Donald's is willing to 'special make' my burger so that its just cheese, how much harder is it to add lettuce? Its already going in the 'special' pile. Just doesn't make sense. This truly is the end of an era for me. Time to find a new burger place, who will make it just the way I like it. This is heartbreaking... for all of you out there who are like me, and like your burgers a little different, walk away from those golden arches, i know its so hard :( But their status has just gotten to their heads, how can they just stop out of nowhere like this! UNREAL PEEPS!